The Motor Bus

Learning to decline in Latin

What does it mean to ‘decline’ a word in grammar? It means to show how various forms of a word are used to indicate different grammatical functions. People are often surprised to learn that even in English we still decline words, mainly pronouns (e.g. he, she, they). So while we say ‘he goes home’ (‘he’ is the subject) we change the form when we say ‘Call him’ (the object case) or ‘His name is John' (the possessive case). So we can decline the word ‘he, him, his’.

Winston Churchill tells the story of how he learned Latin at school and was baffled by the fact that every Latin noun had six forms, including a ‘vocative’ case - a form in which someone or something might be addressed. This makes sense with proper names: to say ‘O Publius’, for instance, one says in Latin O Publi! ‘Publi’ is the vocative case of Publius. It also works for people: o domina! ‘O Mistress’.

What about inanimate common nouns? A typical table of forms (there are six cases in Latin) might look like this:

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mensa              a table (subject)                               nominative
mensa              table!                                                 vocative
mensam           table (object)                                    accusative
mensae            of a table                                           genitive
mensae            to (or for) a table                              dative
menså              by (with, from) a table                     ablative

Churchill learns his cases off by heart, and the teacher is satisfied when he gives the declension of mensa correctly. The story continues…

‘But,’ I repeated, ‘what does it mean?’
‘Mensa means a table,’ he answered.
‘Then why does mensa also mean O table,’ I enquired, ‘and what does O table mean?’ …
“O table,—you would use that in addressing a table, in invoking a table.’
‘But I never do,’ I blurted out in honest amazement.
‘If you are impertinent, you will be punished, and punished, let me tell you, very severely,’ was his conclusive rejoinder.

Worse still, there’s more than one declension, so there are many tables to be learned (all with a vocative). ‘Of a table’ is mensae; but ‘of virtue (virtus)’ is virtutis. And nouns have plural as well as singular forms: ‘of tables’ is mensarum.

In the early 20th century the classical scholar Alfred Godley wrote a fun poem in Latin and English called ‘Motor Bus’, in which the forms of the cases (of nouns and adjectives ending -or and -us) were given in an amusing rhyme. His Victorian pronunciation of Latin (where e.g. the Latin cibi ‘of food’ would have been pronounced ‘sigh-bye’) has given way to a more plausible pronunciation (cibi today is ‘kib-ee’). With this in mind, I updated Godley’s Motor Bus (“What is this that roareth thus?…”) as follows (square brackets show the English phrase that may be said - ideally in a Northern accent - in place of the Latin):

Make a trip without a fuss:
What is best? The Motor Bus.
Train or car is not our way:
te amamus [we just love you], Motor Be!
Bicycles may work for some:
poscimus [we demand] Motorem Bum;
amor - for love is the key -
implet nos [fills our hearts] Motoris Bi;
let us offer praise and glory
excellenti [to the splendid] Bo Motori:
think 'what fun!' before we go
vehi [riding] in Motore Bo.

At the ready stand, we see,
candentes [shining bright] Motores Bi.
(You would tell, I'm sure, some stories,
if you could, O Bi Motores);
many others stationed close
videmus [we observe] Motores Bos.
We admire the decorum
omnium [of all these] Motorum Borum.
Fortunate are those, like us,
usi [who use] Bis Motoribus!

Afterthought: we need a dative plural, so…

Praise to journeys made in peace
da [give], Motoribusque Bis.